


a kiss on the hand may be quite continental

by strawbsnbloobs



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Bad Puns, Banter, F/M, Flirting, Implied Sexual Content, except mari's still all "no chance no way i won't say i'm in love", semi-established marichat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-14
Updated: 2017-03-14
Packaged: 2018-10-04 22:32:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10291706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strawbsnbloobs/pseuds/strawbsnbloobs
Summary: ~o~“I could get a date, you know.”  Marinette read his thoughts on his face and put up a delaying finger.  “With someone other than an akuma.”“Oh, yeah, you’re the cat’s meow,” he smirked.  “But after the way I kissed you last week, Princess, I’mpurrety sure I ruined you for other men.”She snorted daintily.  “For other cats, maybe.”  Her eyes narrowed.  “And that kiss was a mistake.”~o~





	

**Author's Note:**

>   
>   
>  (I originally rated this M, just to be safe since this is after all a kids' show about a bunch of young teens. But then I figured that some implied masturbation didn't need such a big to-do. Still, if that bothers you, there it is.)

_Tap.  Tap tap._

Still nothing.

Chat scratched at the back of his head, huffing out a sigh.  Marinette’s hearing was usually excellent.  Maybe she was absorbed in a design project?  In that case, he shouldn’t bother her.  He groaned in indecision, beginning a restless prowl through the shadowed patches of her rooftop balcony.  Granted, he could leave, but then the catlike side of him that demanded attention (and in fairness to Plagg, that part of him had existed long before becoming Chat Noir) would keep him on edge all night.

 _Five more minutes._      

Five more minutes, then if she still hadn’t answered, he’d leave.  Frustrated, he gave the skylight a less-than-gentlemanly clack with his toe and was rewarded with a muffled shriek from beneath.  Moments later, a flush-flaced Marinette was pushing up the glass and throwing him a familiar look of annoyance.

“Chat, what the hell?  It’s late.”

“It’s always late when I call on you, Princess.”  He wasted no time extending a gloved hand to help her up onto the balcony.  “What kept you?” he pouted.  “Surely someone as kind and thoughtful as you didn’t _mean_ to leave this poor cat out in the cold.”

“Maybe I should,” she teased, marching over to the garden to right a pot of basil he’d tipped over in his pacing.  “It would serve you right for nearly kicking in the skylight on top of me.”

“Slander!  Everyone knows cats have only the softest footfalls.”  He turned on the charm and sent his most dazzling grin her way.  “And even if I did, my only crime was being im-paw-tient for your company.”

“Presumptuous of you to assume I was free to hang out in the first place,” she muttered.  “You don’t know, I might’ve had a date.”

Chat cocked his head.  “You were in your room.  I could hear you moving around.”

“And?  I could’ve had him over.”

“A boy in your room?”  Somewhere in his gut, a bitter green smoke started to roil.  “I doubt that, Princess.”

“Oh?” she turned to him in offense.  “I could get a date, you know.”  She read his thoughts on his face and put up a delaying finger.  “With someone _other_ than an akuma.”

“Oh, yeah, you’re the cat’s meow,” he smirked.  “But after the way I kissed you last week, Princess, I’m _purr_ ety sure I ruined you for other men.”

She snorted daintily.  “For other cats, maybe.”  Her eyes narrowed.  “And that kiss was a mistake.”

“A mistake you’ve repeated.”  He sidled up to her so he could stand within nuzzling distance of her beautiful blush.  “Remind me, how many is that now, Princess?  Eight?”

“Shut up,” she scolded, shoving him back by the shoulder.  “You haven’t even been here eight times since then.”

“Ah, but I wanted to be.”  He knelt, smoothly going down onto one knee and taking her hand.  In a practiced move, he lifted it to his lips, murmuring sweet words.  “I’d spend every… oh, _hello_.”  Chat inhaled deeply, sniffing Marinette’s fingers and quickly recognizing the scent from some of their more… _heated_ trysts.   _The little minx._  No wonder she’d been late coming up to the roof.

He could tell the exact moment Marinette realized what he was doing, but held firm onto her hand when she gasped and tried to pull away.  “Didn’t realize I’d interrupted you, Princess.”  He lowered his mouth to her knuckles, letting his lips and tongue trace between the digits and reveling in her subtle flavor.  “Thinking of me, were you?”

 _“No!”_  Her mortified protest rang out into the night air.  “Oh my god, stop _smelling_ me!”  She managed to wriggle out of his grasp and backed away, turning away from him and crossing her arms.

“Aw, Princess, don’t be embarrassed,” he crooned, stepping around to face her again.  “It’s flattering!”

It was flattering.  And also, _extremely fucking hot_.  The image of Marinette touching herself to thoughts of him flew into his head and Chat had to squash it down lest he turn into a puddle of his own drool right then and there.

Marinette steamed, facing him square-on despite the ladybug-like hue of her cheeks, and he could tell she was going to fight him on this.  “Wipe that grin off your face, Chat, I wasn’t even thinking about you!”

“Really,” he deadpanned.  

Marinette’s arms dropped to her sides, fists clenched.  “It’s true!”  

“Meow-thinks the lady doth purr-test too much.”

“Ugh.”  She turned her chin up at a haughty angle.  “If you must know, I was thinking of a guy in my class.”

“Oh right, a guy in your class.  Is he also a friend of a friend?  Asking for a friend.”

“ _No._ ”  She gritted her teeth, defensiveness ramping up with the speed of her words.  “I mean yes, he _is_ my friend, but he’s also super hot -–he’s a model, so, y'know–- and _he’d_ never ruin the mood with terrible puns!”

 _Holy cheesy Jesus on a cracker._  He channeled Plagg and taunted, “A model, huh?  Isn’t the Agreste kid in your class?”

“None of your business,” she grumbled.

This just kept getting better and better.  “Please.  I’m much better spankbank material than that guy.”  Chat ran his hands tantalizingly down the front of his suit.  “Bet he doesn’t even wear leather.”

“Wowww.”  Marinette took a step back, lips pursed.  “Now who’s being petty?”

He smirked.  “I mean, has the Gabriel brand ever even done an underwear campaign?  At least then you’d have a mental picture.”

“I’ve never seen _you_ naked either, smartass.”

“Mm, true, but my raw sexuality goes beyond clothing.”  He sauntered forward, backing Marinette up to the brick wall.

She arched a perfect eyebrow.  “It’s good you think so.”  Marinette stared him down, an impressive feat since she was actually staring up.  “Considering you literally can’t take your suit off.”

“Details.”  He grinned, angling his head towards her and reaching down to grasp her hands.  “I think  _this_ ,” he lifted one up to his nose and sniffed, before planting a sucking kiss on her wrist, “is proof enough of how irresistible you find me.”

Her feet shifted.  “I _told_ you, I wasn’t–”

A brush of lips to her other wrist cut her off.  “Just admit it, Marinette.”  His voice was soft, husky, and with a light nip to the meat of her palm, he dragged a hot breath from her throat.  “You can’t deny I’ve got… _animal_ magnetism.”

It took a second, but then Marinette’s lips flattened, and she rolled her eyes like it was an Olympic event before pushing him away by his nose.  “More puns, Chat?  Really?  Did you actually _want_ to seduce me, or…?”

“You wound me, my sweet!”   He flashed his 1000-watt smile.  “But hey, if you ever want to put a stop to all this excellent punmanship…”  He tilted his head suggestively, mouth inching towards hers, and set his eyes to smoulder.  “I think you know exactly how to shut meow-p.”

It was a gamble, sure.  But Chat watched with hopeful confidence as Marinette leaned forward, her eyelids lowering and a sinful quirk to her lips.  And then, making his heartrate spike and his stomach swoop all in one move, Marinette shut him up the best way she knew how.

 

(By pushing him off the roof.)

~fin~

**Author's Note:**

> also imagine the next time chat shows up on the balcony there’s a little fridge magnet of a cat or sthg and a stickynote  
> “NOW you've got animal magnetism”  
> bc lbr marinette totally digs the puns  
> (don’t lie mari u luv ur lil wordplayin sinnabon)
> 
> first fic in this fandom, hope you liked it! :)  
> 


End file.
